Twitter Review

Twitter when it first started off, I believed was more professional and more worthy of anyone's time. These are one of the social sites experts recommend for writers and living dolls. I will not leave Twitter, but have mixed feelings about them.

Like what I said, I did like Twitter better years ago. Now Twitter has became less and less professional. To find professional, clean and useful tweets, you must go through the trash first. Twitter users are not as professional as they use to be neither. Now I find many let's just say, things unworthy of professionalism. Now I have a requirement of screening those that follow me before following back. Honestly it is becoming more and more like Facebook, and it proves it when they stated they wished for their site to be more like Facebook. I do not think it is necessary, and it would be less favoured by me. I just wished that Twitter would return like how it was, professional based. 

Recently, I believe Twitter has treated my mother and I unfairly. They have allowed so many on Twitter to harass and make racist statements towards us. Twitter support was reluctant to remove the tweets. It was only through persistence, that they removed them. I believe this is unfair because if it was me harassing someone and being racist, especially the ultimate racist statements (being a terrorist, involved in the Paris attacks, members of ISIS), my account would have been quickly suspended. I am certain if I make a single tweet like that, I am reported and removed from Twitter. Also, Twitter took Facebook's side after the site had done this injustice to us.

Yes, I remain to use Twitter, but I only do it for marketing. I am not into Twitter or visit the site. The only thing I do is share blog posts and other links to help for my author brand. That is pretty much it. 

23andMe Review

Taking a break from my work temporarily. I will return after sharing my review on the company 23andMe. My family are a bit disappointed, but not surprised. We figured the results would be inaccurate. The part that annoys me the most is the fact the company did know in the past we didn't know what our race was. Also we would like to know our real family.

The problem begins when the company claims the results would arrive 8 weeks. It in fact takes much longer than that. We were receiving strange messages on how they really do not know. Then after a long time of waiting, the results are here. First I would like to share the Ethnic Ancestry results.

It is similar to Ancestry, with some results exactly the same as Ancestry.com.

88.6% Sub-Saharan African countries and other percentages of West and South Africa. I study maps and learned to memorize world maps. So I remembered this would no doubt be the same countries that Ancestry showed us. There are a million reasons this cannot be possible. The Drumgole's, the adoptive family are descendants of these countries. So obviously this is somehow coming from their origins and not mine or my mother's.

10.1 % European (the exact same), half British, Irish, Broadly Northwestern European. The only thing that was correct (although not fully) was the British and Irish results.

Now 23andMe is saying we have Native American, small percentage though. I know for a fact that our family does not have Native American traits. We may be mixed with countries Native Americans originated from, but we are not Native American. I think my mother's adoptive family has Native American traits. The percentage they say would seem to fit their family more. The adoptive family are a mix of African and Native American.

1 % Southern European

0.2% Iberian. Although a smaller percentage, it is still like Ancestry.

0.6% Southeast Asian. The percentage is inaccurate.

0% East Asian and Broadly East Asian. I know this is inaccurate. They did not get our Chinese and Cambodian mix. I am rewriting this after learning I have a lot of Asian ancestry from several different countries.

0% Oceanian

0% Middle Eastern & North African. Now this company is saying we have no Middle Eastern or North African traits at all. This is very strange how they could not find any percentage, when Middle Eastern and North African countries sums up my family. The 88.6% should have been for this, but it was not.

When seeing this, we knew it was garbage. The other inaccurate results were physical characteristics, hair and skin. Freckles? Skin pigmentation? For hair, they had nothing, saying it is light or dark hair. The texture said our hair should match African American texture and colors. This is far from the truth. My family's hair is straight. Then what would explain my bright blonde hair? It turned more like a dirty blonde, but it change colors seasonally. My mother's hair change colors to jet black, brown and red. Many people are confused about my blonde hair. Everyone always assumes I'm half Caucasian, especially due to my supposedly "European" appearance. My mother believes there must be a European mix in my family's DNA. I get offended by this, because to me I don't look European and my DNA and parents shows I am not White. Everyone assumes my father is White since obviously my mother is Middle Eastern/Indian, but he is not White. 

Eyes: It says 85% our eyes are a real dark brown, close to black. This is not true. Again, my eyes use to be a real bright reddish brown color, leaning more towards red. It is a bit funny, because my sister would be frightened of me because of my red eyes. They have darkened a bit. However in the spring and summer, they brighten. They are always a reddish brown though, but change colors to this red brown, bright brown and dark brown (not that dark).

Lactose Intolerance: For my mother, they said she is tolerant, but she is intolerant.

Then suddenly it changes the results, which confuses us. The percentage lowers to maybe lesser than 88.6%. A screen pops up that tells us the results may be for recent migrations (they meant the Arabian migration, but not for the Sub-Saharan). The eye color is high for light colors, like blue and hazel. My mother tells me I use to have blue eyes. The hair texture changed now that 90% our hair is straight and wavy. This is true. It's accurate I have blonde hair. I read the Arab DNA can be tricky, because when you look at the African locations, it's actually referring to the Arab descent of these locations. My family sent the company message how inaccurate they were and how disappointed we were and still are. Strangely, they did not deny it was inaccurate. The company admitted to giving us inaccurate results, and apologized. This is when the results began to change.

Still 23andMe failed to find our real family like Ancestry.com was unable to. Instead, they brought us to those who are kin to my step-grandma. I recently found out she is not my real grandma. So the company showed us more of the Drumgole family, the family who adopted my mother. I did speak to a man who believed to have known information on my mother's father. However, it seemed rehearsed, as if my step-grandma told him what to say. However, my family was privileged of meeting a woman who was also adopted. Yet, there was no luck in finding our real family. Not that I wish to meet our family. I feel it's no point in working hard to find people who threw you away, and who never made any effort or who has no interest in finding you. So, I have no interest in meeting my real family. I just would like to know where my mother came from, and the origins of my family's (mother and sister) DNA and ancestry. 

Ancestry and 23andMe both claimed my family had high percentages from Eastern, Western and Southern Africa, mainly originating from the Sub-Saharan area. 23andMe results shown we had an L2 haplogroup. Like what I mentioned before, my family was confused about these constantly changing results. Recently, I read DNA testing companies are more relevant, broader and useful to those of European descent. I read how for non-White DNA, there is limited data to properly test our DNA. Even if this is true, I believe no DNA testing company is 100% accurate even for Europeans. This made sense to my family.

So it would seem 23andMe pulled the results from Ancestry, adoptive family and a random generator. I believe due to this huge inaccuracy, 23andMe is misleading with their advertisements like Ancestry can be. Also it is a complete waste of money and time.     

Tilghman's/Tillman's Plantation & Drumgole

I found a few documentations showing some of the Drumgole family were slaves on the Tillman's Plantation. One of them was known as Rosa Drumgole, or Rosie Williams (changed her name). This was the woman I mentioned before, who actually adopted my mother from Iraq or Saudi Arabia. Yes, she was a foster parent (turned out to become a well known one). She decided to keep her.

The Tillman's Plantation has a long history. I read about Christopher Tilghman, who had ownership of this plantation. John Tilghman or Roger Tilghman (changed name to Tillman), whom I believe took first ownership of the house however. The plantation is in relation to the two States, Virginia and Maryland, exactly where the document says the Drumgole's and also Williams' were slaves. I found this plantation similar to the movie, 12 Years a Slave, kind of scary to be a slave on. I read of runaway slaves, mainly Joshua Drumgole. There was a large search for him, even with the court involved. The penalty of caught runaways were hanging or other deaths. I came across one document in particular which was horrible. A master I think in the 1800's had beat his slave and put salt in his wounds, for trying to escape. To him, that was lucky because the norm was death. No wonder Rosa ran away.

I have also read an interesting documentation of who the slaves (Rosa's relatives) belonged to. It goes back to the 1600's, of how the slaves were past down to the Williams and Drumgole family. Due to how prominent the family was, the slaves' names are documented. This family has relation to help making the song, "Star Spangled Banner". Also a Mexican-American soldier under the command of the well known general, Robert E. Lee, among others. There is even a lot of history on the American Civil War. That is why I kept the document and wanted to read through it for the part about the war. A man stood out who was writing a will. In his will, he gave his slaves and estate to his children and other relatives. It was shocking how the slaves were just exchanged like property. That is what they were labeled as in the actual document, property. The man said (in the 1900's during this time, perhaps 30's) if the slaves were to have children, they were automatically slaves. I was actually shocked that the document lasted all throughout the 1970's. I honestly had no idea plantation type slavery still existed during that time. At least not in the United States.

Rosa Drumgole, I have a document when she was 4 years old. Actually in the document she did not have a last name written down. Another document I read how her father told her she should leave the plantation. That was in spite the risks if she is caught. Rosa heeded her father's words and ran away, leaving her family behind. She was not released however without the help of Lindy Boggs, who was born on the estate. Somehow, Lindy helped Rosa escape. She worked under Lindy's adoption agency. I even have documentation saying how Rosa Drumgole helped Lindy, and traveled with her. Also creating a pharmacy overseas. They would also take children for adoption from China, Korea, Europe and the Middle Eastern countries. This is how Rosa was able to speak different languages. This would also explain how she had the opportunity to adopt my mother. When visiting the Islamic countries, she refused to cover her hair, saying she will never wear cotton on her head again. So all those times, she has mentioned a horse and stuff, it shows the horse was owned by the current owner of the plantation. Her chore was to care for the horse. Everyone says Rosa never mentioned anything about her being on a plantation. It would explain a lot though.

I do not mind giving the documents to the Drumgole family.

Minnesota Paranormal Investigating Team: John Savage Banned from the House

Yes, we have agreed to let our house be registered into the historical records. This means, the house will be a historical house.

The real reason for this post, was to share our experience with a paranormal team called Minnesota Paranormal Investigating Society or something. Everyone knows it by the name John Savage or Alex Johnson. Awhile back, my family asked them a few questions on their Facebook group (when we had Facebook). That is when they insisted that they investigate the house. We just accepted. The book will have full description, but I spoken to Alex Johnson about how we should postpone the investigation until later due to the activity increasing. He all of a sudden, tells me he has no time for games and to be messed around with. He also tells me about how busy they are and how hard it is to squeeze investigations in (like they're the Ghost Adventures or something). Out of all the teams we have contacted, only his team was the only to be this rude. Also he never realized that HE was the one who insisted to investigate the house. We never mentioned anything about investigating. All we were doing was asking questions like usual. They had been Facebook friends for awhile. So to react and reply in that manner was not surprising, but offensive.

That is the reason their team is banned from ever seeing or entering the house. No grudges, but it is just the way Alex replied that offended us. He said it himself he would never investigate the house, and never ask him to visit the house ever again. So that is what we'll do. Anyone affiliated with this team, they also will be banned from the house. I am sure when the full situation is explained as to why we postponed, they will realize they replied too rashly. Alex Johnson was never listening to anything I was telling him anyway. I do not recommend their team or anyone affiliated with them. They are too arrogant, think too much of themselves and just are plain rude. 

Japan: Hotel Bans?

I was reading about Japan, when I came across something that said there was a semi-ban for women to enter a capsule hotel. Wanting to know more about this, I will do more research. This ban is semi because there are hotels that accepts women. Most capsule hotels depending on the location, are men only I read and doesn't allow women though. Whatever city, I will have to know if they accept women now. It wouldn't be quite fun sleeping outside in a different country because of this reason. Since my family's travel is not just a visit in Japan, but a move, it would be similar to being homeless. That is until we get a house. This will be an interesting experience...

Yes, I'm a Gamer!

You know, I am a huge fan of video games. My family owns Xbox One, Playstation 4, Xbox 360, Playstation 2, Nintendo and others. I am open to almost any game. I just hate short games, I feel cheated when finding out it was a short game I was playing. Recently, I find myself playing less due to my studying and work. I still try to find the time to play. My favourite games:

  1. Mortal Kombat 
  2. Halo series
  3. Diablo 3
  4. Baldur's Gate: Dark Alliance
  5. Champions of Norrath
  6. Lego series
  7. Dead Rising
  8. Mario series
  9. Sonic
  10. Resident Evil 
  11. Tekken series
  12. The Legend of Spyro 
I love many more games. Those are just the ones I can remember. Mostly I like dark, horror, fighting, action/adventure and strategy type games. I like new and old games. PC games I am not a fan, but I sometimes play games on my phone. Not recently though. When I do play them, I prefer anything with cute animals.

My video game personality: I'm the type who giggles at almost anything; always seem to manage to find glitches unintentionally in every game (glitches the entire game has to be restarted); often is too good I finish the game too fast; most cannot defeat me in a fighting versus match. When I am playing with someone else, which is most of the time, I tend to collect all of the coins and things, forcing them to do all the work in the game (unintentionally). Also vice versa, although I do not mind doing all of the work. Others often are too busy they do not notice I'm not helping (or just doesn't say anything), or they point out that they're doing everything. I tend to also laugh when there is a game stopping glitch, lose/die, lost in the game or something even if the other is not laughing. 


Mormons are Creepy: Personal Experience

First off no offense to Mormons, but my family has had many experiences with Mormons to label them creepy. The thought of them send chills down my spine. The part about this church that is creepy the most are their peculiar beliefs and stalker/psychopath like system. Mormons do not believe in celebrating holidays, not even birthdays, disapprove in makeup, has racist beliefs, practice and believes in odd marriages that is taboo in the US, also can be similar to the cult Children of God. This cult is an older one basically practiced carnal acts (molestation, etc.). The Mormons practice the same thing but not only with female children. In a later post, I will further share about who founded the Mormon church. His name however was Joseph Smith, from 1830's. Many may not notice this, but I study religions, mainly cults; so I discovered Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints are Mormons, and also this LDS are Mormons.

My mother was baptized by the Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints' church. At the time, she did not know all about them. She would soon know. If the Drumgole family was converting her to Christianity from Muslim, at least they could have warned her of the evil Christ based churches. Everywhere she went, members of the church would be there. They would watch her and listen to everything she said. Unsure how, but Mormons are capable of knowing everything about you, all your life events and knowing when you moved and everywhere you go without you knowing. My mother would get constant messages, saying how they would like for her to attend meetings. Knowing something eerie was about them, she would never go. Mormons are a church that would lead to the woods like other cults. They were setting her up for ungodly things (being held hostage in the woods, of the prey of men). A man, a leader of the church called my mother saying they won't leave her alone and she will always be a member, and they do not let their members go. He demanded that she come to their meetings, motives evil.

To this very day, the Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints has found our address. They also continue to visit and send constant messages to come to their meetings. Even when we have asked them not to contact us and visit, they continue to do so. They always say they won't leave us alone and they won't stop visiting. Once having anything to do with them, they will mark you as a member for life, like what the leader said.

There is another church that I find eerie as well. Jehovah Witness. This church has similar beliefs and a similar system like the Mormons. There are many other cults and questionable churches in the US. From personal experience, I learned to stay clear away from Mormons and the Jehovah Witness. 

YOUnique Product Review

Thick and big eyelashes are one of the keys to being a true living doll. The key is for your eyes to match a doll's. I am unsure how much false eyelashes a living doll goes through. However, I recently got into wearing false eyelashes. It can be quite tedious and time consuming trying to perfectly put the lashes on. Also, lots of money (even if they are cheap) can be spent on eyelashes alone for the living doll lifestyle. It reminds me of the song by Kyary Pamyu Pamyu, tsukematsukeru which is about false eyelashes (official video):



When I was at work (Pro-health Care), a coworker introduced this product called YOUnique. She claimed it can grow eyelashes. It took awhile, but I decided to try the product. Yes, it definitely works. I found my eyelashes growing fast within weeks. This way, I do not have to keep purchasing lashes. Also however, if one chooses to still wear false lashes, this product will enhance the fullness of the lashes. It can give more of a doll appearance, but I find wearing falsies are not necessary.

Instructions: As it says online, you can put on regular mascara if you want to, but this is not a required step. Then you put on a coat of the gel/Younique mascara, put on the natural fibers and then another coat of the gel to keep the natural fibers on the lashes. It says it is best to do one eye at a time, but I do not think it matters.

Cons

  1. The natural fibers or gel can often get into your eyes, causing irritation and redness. One day, I noticed my eye was burning really bad. My eye was also red. I had to run and remove my doll eye makeup. It seems wearing/using this product, you cannot wear much eye makeup plus this. The issue with this is being a living doll, it is required to wear other eye makeup to maintain doll look. Due to the irritation, I skip a day or two from applying the product. During the time I use the product, I often wear my head scarves. I just do not feel confident without all of the living doll makeup to wear my doll/cosplay wigs.
  2. If this product is not applied on frequently, it will not make your own eyelashes fall out, but only the extra growth and fullness from the product will disappear. 
  3. Again, irritation. After applying, I find that it can itch and cause irritation, but I remember I cannot touch or I will wipe the mascara off.    
So is this worth having thicker and longer eyelashes? To me yes. 

Blog Upgrade: Taking Forever

I was hoping to have the blog upgrade sooner, but I find it is taking longer than expected. Artists are still drawing and designing. This is taking awhile. Also it is taking a bit longer deciding on the design, features and everything. I am hoping to get it finished soon however...

Language Learning: My Progress

Learning a different language seems to be like a tricky challenge. One must learn everything over, alphabet, grammar, new words, pronunciation and more. However, I believe learning them is rewarding, but sometimes learning a language is required for various of reasons. I am continuing with my Japanese language studying. Since Japanese pronunciation is the same, unlike English where it changes many times, it can be quick and easy to learn. I learned many words, and learned how to remember how certain Hiragana and Katakana characters look. I even learned some Kanji characters. However, somethings what many say is complicated, I find it is complicated and can be confusing. For instance, counting, telling time, Kanji and a few other things. However, I do not have much difficulty and usually can understand fast. I am a quick learner with Japanese and have no problems at all pronouncing anything. I still have a long way to go. Not that long though. My manager and I are considering also getting a tutor since moving to Japan. She was displeased iTalki did not work out because we could have gotten a tutor there, but no. When learning the language, many things just made me realize in Japan, there are emperors instead of presidents. We are getting use to this.

I have also been learning Korean since it seems Japan has huge involvement with Korea. I learned about the Native Korean and Sino-Korean, but it can be tricky to remember which one is appropriate to use. Korean words can be more tricky to pronounce I learned. When studying Korean characters more, I discovered how easy it is to memorize. I am still at the level how to pronounce everything though.

What I also feel is essential is Chinese. This language can be complicated in a way, but easier to learn. Since Japanese uses Chinese characters, I felt it was good to learn Chinese to really know the difference between the two languages. The words are easier to pronounce for me than Korean, but I will learn Korean. In my situation, it is essential. It's going to take a bit longer however. However, I learned Japanese in a way is the same as Korean and it is easy for those who know Japanese.

I am learning languages only for books. The languages are French, Norwegian and Dutch. I find dutch a very easy language to learn. Everything is easy to memorize and pronounce.

My manager and I are learning Arabic and Turkish. I am learning Turkish more than my manager though. I discovered when actually studying the languages, they were semi-easy in pronunciation and understanding the lessons. Since you must also learn the culture, we have and discovered similarity. Due to this strange similarity, I think the Turkish and Arabian culture, etiquette, likes, dislikes and everything will be easy to remember. I read Turkish is similar to Japanese in some way, but for me Turkish is easier to learn. I have been focusing on the languages that are more important though; at least trying to.

Like with my projects and other studying, I have a habit of multitasking. No I never get languages or cultures confused with each other. Multitasking for language learning I find easy. For Japanese, Korean and Chinese, I find it useful to multitask.

Recent Updates for Proud Land Haunted House

Finding the history of the house seems impossible. I contacted Anoka County historical society and also other places with no luck. Here is the issue, the house address cannot be looked up because it is like the house doesn't exist; they always tell us to give them a name, but it doesn't matter. If we have names, they are never in the database, so there is no point in giving anyone a name. When I search, only the current owner shows, nothing more. No one is willing to share any information with us, and there is no successful way in contacting previous owners that are still alive. They simply do not wish to contact us for some reason.

The city hall told us they can only go back to 1959, and gave us a list of names, but still they are not found in any database. I spoken with someone from the historical society about how old the house is. My family knows this house was built earlier than 1910. I study old houses and know this myself. Also, this house has a dark past which caused so much darkness to manifest. I wish to have the history of the house and the reasons why it was vacant many times, and did anyone else experience paranormal things. My family, especially me since I am writing the book would like to know everything there is to know about the house, including who built it and when it was built. This information seems like it cannot be retrieved however. All my family has to go by are paranormal experiences, visions and dreams, with nothing to confirm anything. We are even settling for someone who was familiar with an individual; who is related to someone who has either lived in the house or has been seen in the house.

For books, I study house styles for the US and recently Japan. Oh, also for UK. I found out through my research the house is considered a Folk Victorian, which is a little influence from Gothic revival. This house is very unique in style though, so here is the house.


In the backyard and all throughout the yard, we have found many Native American relics, stones and items to indicate the house was built on Native American land (also with the embalming tools, bullet and among other items). I strongly believe from my research that it is on top of mounds, burial grounds. Now Archaeologists in the State and also the Anoka County historical society are interested in the house. They wish for us to allow the house to be a historical site due to the items found in the yard, and the odd story this house seems to have. Plus it is haunted. It is disturbing also, but my family has found carpet in the yard. When I looked this up, it always says this means there was a missing persons' murder that occurred. I decided not to dig it up because I felt strange about disturbing a grave even if it was murder and they were buried in the yard. My family is going to place flowers in the areas the carpet was found. Also since the Native American burial ground, I respect Native Americans. So I felt some parts of the yard should be left alone and should not be disturbed again. The backyard is strange though and looks like a burial ground and grave-site. There are many signs that show many has died in the house, and many has been buried on the property. I just wished we had documentation on the house, but we have none.

Soon my family will register the house into the Archaeologist and historical records. I guess the house will indeed become a historical site. Just did not expect it to happen this fast.  

Where Are The Pastors During a Haunting?

After viewing hours of other paranormal cases, I have noticed a common issue when facing a haunted house or place. Having dealt with this myself, I will share my family's full experience with trying to seek help from pastors and priests.

All pastors and priests, and even all Christians tell you, you should never seek help from psychics, paranormal investigators or anyone related. Also from my family's strong belief in our religion and strict living, we too are strongly against seeking help from psychics, investigators and those that dabble into other religions or occult like practices.

When dealing with a paranormal issue however, many pastors or Christian leaders avoid anything paranormal altogether. They even dislike discussing it or answering any paranormal question you might have. Later, I will repost my old post on the heated debate on what are ghosts exactly. It shares the views of Christians and compare them with paranormal investigators and mediums. Obviously there are conflicting beliefs. This is the reason Christian leaders will often not handle paranormal cases. My family's experience was horrible, especially due to the severity of the hauntings in our house. We have contacted and seeked help from many pastors and priests, but not one was willing to perform an exorcism or cleanse the house. We were even settling for a prayer over the house, but they all declined this as well. Some even told us they do not believe in ghosts, they must be in our imagination and other reasons why they won't visit the house. Also they are quick to assume we have played with a Ouija Board or dabbled in dark magic. I am highly offended by those who try to tell us it is not really happening, like haunted houses do not exist. I cannot be convinced the paranormal is nothing but in our minds. No, nothing of the paranormal realm makes sense though. That is why I decided to become a paranormal researcher. 

I am not saying all are this way, but many are. What is a victim of a haunting to do when this happens? These pastors almost force many to turn to psychics and paranormal investigators for help. This is only because they refuse to help. It can be frustrating being desperate and weary from what you are experiencing, only to find out the pastor or priest will not help. I mean, we are not ordained to properly remove spirits on our own. If so, all of our attempts would have worked. Again unfortunately, this leads to many owners desperately seeking for any sort of help. No, my family never came to the point where we would break the laws of our religion; at least not intentionally. Yes, we have contacted paranormal investigators. Not to remove the spirits, but to have evidence of the spirits, but everyone had been too afraid to visit the house. About the haunted Durango, well, many were interested, including the two ghost hunters Mark and Debbie. What really happened to the two will be included in the book. We also do apologize and that was a shock. No one really knew what the spirits in the Durango were capable of doing. My family had a sense, but not like that. A man who is actually Muslim contacted me to remove the spirits in our house. Yes, this will be in the book and I am prepared for the criticism for giving him permission to try and remove the spirits, and for contacting paranormal investigators. It's kind of bittersweet and I am not even sure if the spirits are all gone. I believe whatever happened in the past in the house, that will always cause paranormal activity to occur in the house.

Next, I would like to share an important issue my family still has with the house's past. 

Issues Only a Living Doll Can Understand

A list of issues only a living doll can understand. After being a living doll, I have discovered these problems from experience. Here is the list:



Those Weird Stares

 

Yes, I have came across and discovered the issue where others give me weird stares due to how I am dressed. Some are obvious disapproval and misunderstanding. Being a living doll, I learned the key is to be nonchalant and ignore those stares. I usually do ignore them, and continue on with my business.



Inevitable Questions

 

Living dolls, especially me have dealt with those who approaches or just question about the doll attire. Like what I said in the other post, it does depend upon the individual and where living dolls go. I find more disapproval in my attire in Christians and Christ based religions and churches. Also most I find a pattern in certain ethnic races. Others outside of Japan or who is not Asian simply will asks these questions, not understanding our doll wear or Japanese fashion. It first starts with the weird staring, frowning or weird expressions on their faces, mumbling among themselves or to those they may be accompanied with among other obvious confusion. I simply ignore these particular individuals. Here is my personal question and comment list: 

  1. Why are you dressed like that? 
  2. Any particular reason you're dressed that way? (Like there must be some strange special occasion) 
  3. Don't you think it is too early or too late for Halloween costumes?
  4. Why are you so dressed up? 

 

 

 Ending Up on Those Plastic Surgery Fails and Online Criticism

 

I came across Youtube Videos and other things that lists living dolls as failed plastic surgery. Also they constantly criticize our decision in becoming a living doll. Many have the criticism that we will later regret becoming a living doll, they believe we are delusional and unrealistic, they alienate us sometimes and feel like this is not "normal" and call this weird or taboo, they criticize that we will never be accepted into society, social situations and will not be able to find jobs, becoming a living doll is a complete waste of money and time; many assume we (although some do) are living dolls for attention or assume all living dolls have low self esteem. Also they believe we are living in a fantasy world and consider us to be fake. What I say to this is, everyone has a choice what they choose to be, what they choose to do with their body, and their choice with their money. Life is all about choices, and human beings should be able to freely decide what they wish to do with their life. To me, living dolls are not a fail, but beautiful. I take offense to these comments, but I shrug my shoulders; everyone has their own opinion. Not everyone can see our beauty though. 



Everyone Assumes All Living Dolls Move to Japan

 

Not all living dolls want to move to Japan. In fact, there are living dolls who live all across the world. Some might say I contradict myself since I am moving to Japan. However, it is not solely because I am a living doll. My move to Japan is primarily for work, publishing and business reasons. It does not matter anyway though. Being a living doll often goes into the Japanese culture and fashions. Also living dolls are often more accepted by the Japanese and other Asians than any other race. I do notice when wearing my doll clothing if in the presence of an Asian, females are always delighted and compliment me. Male Asians do not have any questions neither, nor do they stare strangely. It is almost like it is normal to them. However, like being a fan of anime/manga may cause others to develop an interest in Japanese and other Asian cultures, being a living doll can develop the same interests with some living dolls.



Friends or Family Members Who Disapprove 


Some living dolls may not have this problem, but some of us have the issue where there is always a friend or family member (more so family members) who disapprove of how we dress. Also disapproval of the decision in becoming a living doll. There may be family who are embarrassed to be seen with us, or rudely criticize our decision. Honestly, we already get criticism from online and others outside; we do not need our own family disapproving as well. I watched My Strange Addiction and saw the living doll Emily. I believe personally the step-mother is cruel, and her father and other family members are wrong for allowing the step-mother to speak so criticizing to her. Like many living dolls, Emily says it makes her feel better about herself, increases self esteem, this is who we are. Many living dolls feel ugly and feel better when they are a living doll. There is nothing wrong with doing whatever will make you happy, no matter the opinion of others. That is my motto and what I plan to do. 



Those Annoying Family Members That Schemes to Ride on Your Back


I am fortunate to not have a mother or family like this, but some living dolls I see have this issue. Some parents or family members, even friends have a scheme to ride on the back of the living dolls' success. They also wish to gain the earnings they make from their living doll career. Also they are there beside them only to use them and not genuine support, although sometimes it may seem like it is genuine, but it is not.



Getting Ready & After An Outing

 

Being a living doll, I realized it takes me longer to get ready to leave. I try to get ready as quickly as I can, but living dolls cannot rush too quickly for a perfect doll look. Now, my mother and family ends up waiting for me to get ready. To keep up with the living doll lifestyle, there are a few issues I have when getting ready. 

  1. When I have several doll outfits, picking out which outfit to wear for that outing. Also when I have like a gazillion accessories, there is the issue choosing which accessories or accessory to wear with my outfit. This includes the many socks I have that are all kawaii and difficult to choose which one to wear. To be a living doll, everything must also be put on and worn perfectly. That is the goal as a living doll, the idea is to look perfect or almost perfect like a doll.
  2. I am a living doll who wears cosplay wigs because currently I portray as existing characters. I am trying to collect wigs that match the Ellowyne Wilde doll. I have only one Ellowyne Wilde doll wig at the moment. Anyway, it can be difficult to choose from hundreds of wigs I have. I ask, who do I want to be today? 
  3. Makeup. Yes, being a living doll there are particular doll type makeup we have to put on in order to look like a living doll, and to keep up with our doll like appearance. I try to hurry, but I do not want to rush too quickly. Putting on the makeup wrong will make a living doll look like a failed attempt and a rush job, like what it is.
After going outside, it takes awhile taking off all the doll things. There are many steps and especially after a long day (since I am able to work wearing my doll attire), these steps can be less desired. However I still have to do it. The steps: 
  1. Taking off the wig and properly putting it away. 
  2. Taking off all accessories. The more a living doll wore, the more you have to take off. Then putting them away neatly in a drawer. 
  3. Removing the doll socks and putting them away. 
  4. Taking off the doll clothing. This step it depends upon what the living doll wore, but this alone can take awhile to do. Some clothing have buttons that needs to be unbuttoned, ribbons and ties that needs to be untied, zippers that has to unzipped. Plus some clothing especially when I wear historical clothing, Decora clothing, Kei fashion or Lolita (what I mostly wear), there are jackets, aprons and pieces that needs to be taken off before taking off the actual outfit itself. Majority of these doll clothing are from Japan or China or other Asian countries. Therefore they are a bit form fitting. The historical clothing that was bought, even if they are from the US, they are still made for petite human beings. I am lucky to be petite myself. However, there is also the underskirt which makes the dresses or skirts puffy and full looking that also needs to be taken off. Wearing historical clothing, more items needs to be taken off.  

 

Upcoming Move to Japan

I have been studying the Japanese language and everything about Japan before my family's move. In my opinion, I believe doing extensive research on the location one is to travel to is wise. While I have been studying and working on my projects, especially my first novel series, I am also studying about Japan and the language. I am teaching everything I learn to my family. I am now at a level I can pronounce Japanese words like a native speaker. I memorized the alphabet and is able to communicate in Japanese. However I am still not fluent. I am multitasking with my language learning but focusing more on Japanese. For my novel series, I am learning French. What I find useful languages to learn for my travel is Korean and Chinese. I am still learning Arabic, but since my upcoming move to Japan, I have sort of put that on hold since it is not essential for me to learn right now. Studying these languages is returning my natural accent it took me a few years to drop, but that is fine I guess. I have always had a Turkish, Uzbek, Irish mix type accent, but learned how to talk without an accent. Anyway, the accent helped me a bit better pronounce Japanese and Korean words.

We are looking to live in Tokyo closest to our work, also any other location such as Shirakawa, Takayama, Osaka or Kyoto or another location. My family has grown use to small towns since where we live now is a small town. That is why we are moving to a small town or village.

I heard Japan is however the least Vegetarian country in the world. Japan is known for using fish or some sort of meat products for everything edible. My manager and I do not take well to over exotic foods or foods that is not simple in flavor. Vegetarians however are taboo and strange to Japanese. Also they do not consider fish as meat, like some Americans. However they are more strong in the belief fish is not meat. My manager and I currently is looking into the Buddhist Monk's diet and Halal foods. We regularly eat Halal foods and learned we have a love for the food. We basically eat the same sort of foods. I am unsure about the Monk diet, but I read how Monks are more traditional and eat more vegan/vegetarian foods than the rest of Japan. My manager and I just have never tried Monk diet foods. We are looking into it before moving to Japan. Actually in the past, all of Japan were like the Buddhist Monks and did not eat meat. Also we are going to grow our own edible garden. My sister and step-grandma won't have an issue eating most things in Japan though.

During my research also, I have heard there is a Rabbit and Cat island. Being allergic to cats, we will avoid the cat island. There are Deer that are sacred. In Japan, Deer are descendants and messengers from the Shinto Gods. Like in the US we see Geese, there are Deer. Kawaii animals even are in Japan such as Raccoon Dogs and the Snow Monkey. So cute! Also Foxes; a festival called Kitsune Festival exists as well. I read about slippers that is worn when entering houses, and also toilet slippers. The important note is to never forget to remove the toilet slippers before leaving the bathroom to avoid embarrassment, among other essentials to avoid embarrassing oneself. Instead of hand shakes, there is more of the bowing when greeting, and the angle and length of your bow determines how much respect is shown. I have learned about the etiquettes, titles/honorifics, grammar, holidays, music, festivals, food among other things about Japan. That importantly includes business, working and publishing in Japan. I believe this is the proper way also in learning and understanding the language one wishes to learn.

I believe as a living doll, I won't be strangely stared at because I believe Japanese better perceive living dolls than the US and other countries. 

Gross! Embalming Equipment Found

Awhile ago my family found strange bottles and items in the house, but mostly in the yard. They looked old and so I kept them in my collection of found items in the house.

Recently, I did research and discovered they were used for funeral preparation and embalming. It is disgusting because we grew our edible garden where these items were found. At the time, we had no idea what these items were. The concept does not settle with me well. I do not think we will use the yard to grow vegetables and fruits ever again.

Since we will mulch the yard, I will take a metal detector and start seeing what else I can find in the yard. I am also going to thoroughly look inside the house. For the items I already found, I will find them in my collection and photograph them. 

Getting Approved for Plastic Surgery

It's like suddenly the process of starting my doll transformation is going fast. Last week, I went to see if I am physically able to hav...